The Andersons

Well, it's about time. In an effort to get settled into married life, I had to put a few things on hold--blogging happened to be one of them. I sure have missed my blog.

In exactly four days, Darron and I will have been married two months. I absolutely love married life. I tease Darron a lot about how much laundry he accumulates! I wash clothes about twice a week to stay on top of everything. I was listening to a Marriage on the Rock CD on "Designing Your Dream Spouse." In the lesson, the female author of the book with the self-same title of the lesson shared how she spent the first four years of her marriage comparing her husband to her father or some other great, male leaders that she admired in her church. Why can't you be like Brother Such-and-Such, the great orator and speaker? Or Minister Whatcha-ma-call-him, the man of the supernatural? Unbenownest to her she was tearing her husband down with her words until one day she looked up and she didn't even recognize him.

Realizing that she was serving as a destructive force of the enemy rather than a "builder", she began to actively seek out wise counsel. She remembered a woman whose personality is typically domineering, passionate and strong who was married to a more reserved male. "How in the world does she do it?" she mused. How does she keep from running over him?" As she spoke with her friend and new mentor she learned a critical truth. She didn't marry the man in his "height" of greatness. In fact, he was far from that early in their relationship. But rather than speaking "to the gap" she spoke to his potential. (Lisa Bevere quote)

How many of us women speak to our spouse's gap (lack or insufficiency)? To our children's gaps rather than speaking to their potential? Proverbs 14:1 states, "A wise woman builds her house but the foolish tears it down with her own hands." With her own hands.

Are you your family's worse enemy?

Taking the wise advice of this woman who had been married longer than she and was experiencing sustained success in her marriage relationship, the mentor encouraged her to identify a man in the Bible to whom she could "safely" compare her husband to without tearing him down. And with the Holy Spirit's guidance, she identified Joseph as the biblical character that she most found as sharing similar attributes and character traits of that of her husband.

Most people know the story of Joseph's coat with many colors. This woman went out and bought a brand new suit for her husband. Then holding up the coat she allowed that coat to represent her husband as she tenderly laid hands on it and began to intercede for her husband. As she poured herself into that prayer something supernatural began to happen. She began to see her husband as Christ saw him and thus began to treat him as if he were a Joseph. She began to pray for him as if he were already the mighty leader rather than looking at him in disdain because he was still on "the path to becoming".

So as I wash my Beloved's laundry, I pray over his day-to-day business. I pray for wisdom and favor to rise up in him. I declare success, and light and understanding. I declare increase and promotion.

It's a powerful thing to see a man through God's eyes.

Million Dollar Question:

Whether you are married or not, does/will your spouse see his or herself through your eyes? Is that an encouraging or discouraging thing?
If it is discouraging, in what way can you begin changing that today? If it is encouraging, in what way can you increase the empowerment that you provide?